Handed a full house

Just enough articles in the news jumping out at me, so it looks like it's time for another round of Shotgunning the News:

Strengthening Iran
Today, The Guardian put out an article claiming that the United States "War on Terror" has served to strengthen Iran's position in the Middle East, and it's rather hard to argue the point. After all, before toppling Hussein, Iran was barely a blip on our cultural radar, and was definitely not a threat. However, because of the boondoggle with the way that Iraq has been handled, the Iranian government is gathering a following in their neighbor. This should be raising more eyebrows globally, given that, for decades, Iran and Iraq couldn't agree on much of anything, and now the Iraqis are looking to their former enemies for assistance. Of course, the recent failure of Israel to achieve verifiable results in the campaign against Hezbollah (including the current cease-fire which Israel is straining with raids) has also helped to bolster the position of Iran in the area.

The real question with regards to this whole mess should of course be the President and his doomed notion to "stay the course", but that seems to be getting missed overall. Nevermind that the last time the US launched a "war" on a concept, we're still struggling to achieve actual victory, and have quite possibly improved the status of those whose ideals we're fighting against. Maybe it's time we launched a "War on Democracy", just to see if that, like terrorism or the drug trade, will grow at the same rate.

Or maybe it's already too late for that.

Really Not Ready for Primetime
There are reports that early suspicions regarding Saturday Night Live cast members being released are being confirmed through internal memos. Of course, NBC is not confirming, or even commenting (aside from the non-confirmation) on the subject. However, if the reports are true, then this season's SNL could be missing some of its key players.

Wait a minute. Looking over the article, it mentions that these people were comedians. I could've sworn that SNL stopped hiring comedians decades ago, at least for on-screen bits (with exception, of course, to Tina Fey, who's damned funny).

Don't Stimulate the Japanese
Officials for a Tokyo subway are declining to allow an advertisement for Harper's Bazaar to appear at stops. That advertisement was meant to feature August covergirl Britney Spears, in her naked and pregnant (and airbrushed) glory. The reasoning offered for turning down the full advertisement was that it might be "overly stimulating". The ads will be modified to feature Britney covered from the elbows down.

"Overly stimulating"? Britney Spears? About the only thing she can stimulate at this point (other than KFed making a bigger ass of himself than he already has) is inducing vomiting. Which, if we remember back to Bush Sr., the Japanese really don't look fondly on. So I guess they've made the right decision.

JANE and Community Service
Have problems getting a date that's willing to go all the way? That's apparently the problem faced by a reader of JANE magazine, who has enlisted their help in losing her virginity before she turns 30. This may seem odd, as, judging from the photo, she's at least passably attractive, and attractive women have little problem finding someone to sleep with, generally.

Ah, but there's a catch. Apparently she's looking for someone who isn't a complete jerk, and would actually be willing to have something of a relationship before allowing her to dance the horizontal mambo for the first time. To really cap it off, she's going to let the readers of JANE decide the right guy for her. And to think, a few years back, if you wanted to find someone for yourself, you actually had to do things like go out to clubs, and ask your friends. Now, with this "contest" and internet dating, you can move closer to getting filled out like an application from the privacy of your own home.

Love is in the air, indeed.